Chapter 1: The Pursuit of Success

From a young age, I aspired to achieve success for a multitude of reasons. Now that I find myself in a position I once dreamed of, I realize it’s not quite what I envisioned.

Growing up, I was deeply influenced by the ‘hustle culture,’ which instilled in me the belief that without success, I was squandering my life. The pressure to outpace my peers made me feel that my achievements were irrelevant if not reached ahead of others. Consequently, I dedicated myself to relentless hard work throughout college, often questioning, “What more can I accomplish?”

However, everything began to change in 2022 when I was introduced to the concept of ‘slow living’—a philosophy centered around living thoughtfully and with intention. This approach helped me realize that I need not rush through life in anticipation of a singular moment of success. Instead, it taught me to appreciate the everyday moments while still nurturing my ambitions.

This transformation led me to start declining opportunities that didn’t resonate with me, even if it meant having less. For instance, in 2022, I decided to stop accepting freelance projects to fully commit to my goal of becoming an author and writing for myself. Initially, I struggled with a lack of clients and financial instability, often haunted by the successes of my peers who were earning six figures. Doubts crept in, but there was a newfound beauty in my daily life that I refused to abandon in my quest for success.

I continually reminded myself, “To embrace one path, you must say no to countless others.” I chose to focus on my writing journey, aware that it wouldn’t be easy and that financial challenges lay ahead. I committed to not letting others’ achievements sway my resolve.

This journey was gradual. Each week, I needed to reinforce my decision, trusting that I had chosen a fulfilling path. I began to cultivate a life that I genuinely enjoyed, incorporating simple pleasures and routines that aligned with my natural rhythm. For example, I would start my mornings with a cup of coffee while scrolling through Pinterest. While some might view this as unproductive, it brought me joy.

Through such habits, I constructed a satisfying life. Although I still aspired to achieve more, I refused to let urgency or fear dictate my pace.

When the Time Changed:

It’s hard to pinpoint exactly when it happened, but after the publication of my book, The Art of Being Alone, I found myself recognized as successful. My book became an international bestseller, and receiving heartfelt emails from readers filled me with love and gratitude.

Yet, success has its downsides. I self-published my work via Amazon, and within two weeks, my account was deleted twice. They even informed me that I wouldn’t receive any earnings from my sales. The anxiety that ensued was overwhelming, leading me to question my entire journey. It was a crippling kind of anxiety, where each breath felt labored, and my heart raced with fear.

Even now, with my account restored, I still grapple with anxiety. Every notification triggers dread about potential future mishaps. Once, I woke up with a sense of tranquility, but now, a constant undercurrent of fear lingers.

The Dark Side of ‘Success’:

This experience has shed light on the darker facets of success. Achieving your dreams is challenging, but maintaining that success can be even more daunting. We often deceive ourselves into believing that happiness comes from reaching a milestone, but that’s a myth. The reality is that the struggle and stress remain constant companions. Initially, we worry about not achieving our goals on time, and later, we fear losing what we have.

This entire ordeal has imparted a crucial lesson: Surrender.

Endless worrying and the desire to control every outcome can lead to madness. We tend to overthink, believing that by anticipating the worst, we can prepare for the unknown, but that’s simply not true. Life unfolds regardless of our plans, and we must learn to let go of the need to control everything.

What’s destined to happen will occur. If we remain trapped in our thoughts, we risk missing out on real life, becoming the person burdened by stress—someone nobody wishes to be.

Currently, I am learning to embrace surrender. Some days, I feel I’ve mastered this art, while on others, fear resurfaces like an unwelcome ghost. I share this with you to emphasize that despite my reflections, I am far from perfect. I am human, and I don’t possess a switch to easily toggle my feelings.

Perhaps this phase of life is an opportunity for me to master the art of surrender. As I compose this article, I feel better than ever, but who knows how I’ll feel in the next moment? I could craft this article to suggest I have perfected surrender, but it’s a journey that demands time and patience.

Conclusion:

First and foremost, understand that you cannot bypass life, waiting for a future moment to enjoy it. You can find happiness in your daily existence, not just in the anticipation of a grand finale. Make it your goal to cherish each day, rather than postponing joy.

Secondly, cultivate the art of surrender. Allow life to unfold naturally, leaving room for surprises—both good and bad. Even if you attempt to overthink or control every situation, you ultimately cannot alter the course of events. But in surrendering, you may discover peace, empowering yourself for whatever the future holds. On good days, enjoy the moment; on challenging days, learn to persevere. None of these experiences can alter the essence of who you are.

The first video titled "Will Smith - The BEST Things in Life are on the Other Side of FEAR" provides insights on overcoming fears and embracing growth.

The second video "Success Is Just On The Other Side" explores the idea that achieving success requires facing challenges and pushing through adversity.