# Give Michael Collins His Space: Reflections on Apollo 11
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Chapter 1: Michael Collins' Solitary Orbit
Michael Collins, the Apollo 11 astronaut known for orbiting the moon alone, has a humorous take on the attention he receives. "I’m going to find a nice big rock, and I’m going to hide under it," he quipped during a recent conversation. With the 50th anniversary of the Apollo 11 mission approaching, Collins found himself inundated with requests for interviews and appearances. This is a familiar scenario for him, as he has dealt with similar demands at every major milestone since the mission. Although he is accustomed to the spotlight—being an astronaut comes with its share of public engagements—he does not necessarily relish it. This time, the pressure feels even more intense.
Despite his crucial role, Collins did not set foot on the lunar surface. While Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin descended in the lunar module, Collins remained in the command module, orbiting above. He missed the landing but was in contact with Mission Control, listening as Armstrong reported the historic moment. For more than a day, Collins floated alone, listening to the sounds of his crewmates exploring the moon's rugged landscape. The communication would often drop as he passed behind the moon, leaving him in silence. Yet, the most beautiful sight for Collins was the return of the lunar module, a tiny dot against the vast lunar backdrop.
Now at 88 years old, Collins reflects on his life post-Apollo 11. He never returned to space, instead pursuing a career with the State Department and later as the director of the Smithsonian National Air and Space Museum. Today, he enjoys retirement in Florida, often preferring to read books and newspapers over reliving his historic past. "I can’t say I wake up every morning thinking, 'Oh, Apollo 11, blah blah,'" Collins shares. "I might go months without a thought about it, but when it comes back, it’s crystal clear."
Amidst the media frenzy surrounding the mission's anniversary, Collins recalls one significant detail that eludes him: how he learned he would be part of the Apollo 11 crew. In his autobiography, he humorously admits to not recalling how he got the news, wondering if it was communicated by Neil or Deke Slayton, the director of flight crew operations.
Section 1.1: Collins' Journey to NASA
Collins became an astronaut in 1963, shortly after NASA's establishment. A young pilot with three small children, he was born to a military family in Rome. Following his graduation from West Point, he opted for the Air Force, steering clear of accusations of nepotism given his family's military background. While stationed at Edwards Air Force Base, Collins heard that NASA was seeking new astronauts. "I had no childhood dream of flying to the moon, but the idea was incredibly appealing," he wrote after John Glenn's historic orbit of the Earth in 1962.
Subsection 1.1.1: NASA's Rapid Advancements
In the seven years following Glenn's flight, NASA achieved remarkable milestones. The agency conducted intricate spacecraft maneuvers in Earth's orbit and even sent crews around the moon. Although they faced tragic losses, engineers persevered, driven by President John F. Kennedy's goal to land a man on the moon by decade's end. By the summer of 1969, only the landing remained.
Section 1.2: Training for Apollo 11
Collins spent countless hours training for Apollo 11. He often flew between NASA centers, accumulating 400 hours in command-module simulations, honing his skills for various scenarios, including reentry into Earth's atmosphere. "The challenges were more mental than physical," he reflects. "I had to solve numerous mysteries involving obscure equipment failures."
Collins carried the unique responsibility of being the only means of return for his crewmates. While Armstrong and Aldrin descended to the moon's surface, he needed to ensure their safe return. The potential for mishaps loomed large; he had to be prepared to fly the command module back to Earth alone.
Chapter 2: The Experience of Isolation
Collins emphasizes that during the mission, he had little time to dwell on his solitude. There were systems to monitor and tests to conduct. Although he acknowledges it would have been preferable to be on the lunar surface, he found the panoramic views from orbit satisfying. "On the surface, you’re in the middle of a crater, but in orbit, you see everything," he notes.
For many, the moon is merely a flat disk in the sky. However, Collins and the other astronauts experienced it as a three-dimensional sphere, beautifully illuminated by light and shadow. He poetically describes the far side of the moon, forever obscured from view. "Outside my window, I can see stars — and that is all. Where I know the moon to be, there is simply a black void."
The solitude of his mission often prompts questions from journalists. What was it like to be so isolated? Collins consistently responds, "I was not lonely." Despite some media portrayals, he found comfort in the quietude after days spent with two other astronauts. During a tense moment before launch, Collins appreciated the peace he would find with only his computer for company.
After returning to Earth, the Apollo 11 crew became national heroes, embarking on a worldwide tour that included a ticker-tape parade in New York City. They traveled extensively, shaking hands with admirers, including royalty. "For the first few years post-flight, Dad couldn’t go anywhere without being recognized," recalls Kate Collins, Michael's daughter.
While the media attention can be overwhelming, Collins wishes for a different type of inquiry. "I’ve never had it before — but how do you go potty in space?" he muses, explaining that the answer is simply "carefully." It's a humorous reminder that even historic missions come with mundane challenges.